Between the idea

and the reality

Between the motion

And the act

Between the emotion

And the response

Falls the Shadow

     -T. S. Eliot

There is nothing more for me to say

how i really feel.

LOVE is not about being it being easy i dont give a shit what anyone says. and i dont understand any of this i think it is totally retarted (yes i said it RETARTED) because we are perfect for eachother. what is our only problem?? NOT SEEING EACHOTHER.  HOW THE FUCK WOULD NOT BEING TOGETHER FIX THAT? it wouldnt it would just make things worse. yea u could move one and what not eventually, but why? I love every minute i spend with you and wouldnt want anything else. i just dont get it. If u dont think were strong enough or that we wont last, honestly.......then why are you still trying!! think about that, cause u know u love me and want to be with me. and its bull shit for u to tell me or urself otherwise. love is the present (which sucks) but it is also the future. i dont know about you but i REALLY do want you there with me though everything, til death do us part. if u want to love me (or anyone for that matter) forever u arent going to have the perfect day everyday. I hate it that you moved. but remember everytime u hate it that u moved from me. thank god it not being the other way cause we wouldnt have made it. and thats bull shit too. that ones about trust. which is completely unfair. I trust very single move you make, not because i have no past experience of lying, but because i know u have know reason to lie to me, but thats a whole different issue. and when ever i am upset i never try to gett pissy, but this is me mad. i guess the only question you have to ask yourself is it hard loving me or not seeing me and where do u see yourself in 3 years?

i dont know what I am going to do. found out today that my parents only back me if i make the choices they want. never in this made up fantasy of life that i had did i really have any true options. which makes me want to do it all, on my own, say fuck you im out, if u wont support me for who i am, fuck you. but thats terrfying....what if i cant make it on my own theres SOOOO much out there...some people can get it, but not me Is it so unreasonable for me to want my parents to support me for who i am? im sorry im not my brother, im sorry im not perfect, but am i really so bad?

im breaking down and i need you now more than ever

I’d give it all
I’d give for us
Give anything but I wont give up